10 лучших непристойных фраз легендарной Фаины Раневской

Ее знаменитый юмор – едкий, очень точный и почти всегда циничный – давно считается классикой. Сегодня мы решили похулиганить и вспомнить 10 лучших непристойных фраз легендарной Фаины Георгиевны Раневской.

1. Надоедливым поклонникам

Фраза: «ПионЭры, идите в **пу!»

Фаину Георгиевну ужасно раздражало, когда, увидев ее на улице, прохожие (особенно дети) начинали кричать: «Муля, не нервируй меня!» Однажды ее окружила толпа школьников, радостно скандировавших знаменитую фразу из «Подкидыша». Тогда Раневская и сказала в сердцах: «Пионеры, идите в **пу!»

Схожая участь постигла тимуровцев, заявившихся домой к актрисе с предложением помочь по хозяйству. «ПионЭры! Возьмитесь за руки – и идите в **пу!» — отчеканила она и захлопнула дверь.

К слову, однажды за любовь к шутке про Мулю досталось даже Брежневу. Он не удержался и повторил ее, прикалывая к груди Раневской Орден Ленина, на что получил гневную отповедь: «Леонид Ильич, так меня называют или мальчишки, или хулиганы!» «Простите, но я Вас очень люблю», — смутился генсек.

2. Против пафоса

Фраза: «Под каждым павлиньим хвостом скрывается куриная **па»

Этот афоризм едва ли не самый известный среди высказываний Раневской: «Под самым красивым павлиньим хвостом скрывается самая обычная куриная **па. Так что меньше пафоса, господа!»

Так точно выразить отношение к жизни, к коллегам и к самой себе удавалось мало кому. Кстати, недавно во время очередного твиттер-скандала это выражение прозвучало в адрес телеведущей Ксении Собчак, ранее употребившей афоризм Раневской о пионЭрах в адрес журналистов. В общем, с помощью обмена меткими фразами Фаины Георгиевны нового витка громкой ссоры Собчак с папарацци удалось избежать. По крайней мере, пока.

3. О свободе выбора

Фраза: «Каждый волен распоряжаться свой **пой, как хочет»

Вообще, похабное слово из четырех букв было у Фаины Георгиевны одним из любимых. Однажды она так и ответила некой дотошной журналистке: «Мата я не стесняюсь. И в лексиконе моем любимое слово – «**па», а не «отлично».

Доказала это Раневская на партсобрании в театре, где одного из актеров, заподозренного в гомосексуальных связях, пламенно клеймили за недостойное советского работника искусств поведение. «Каждый волен распоряжаться своей **пой, как ему хочется, — заявила артистка. – Поэтому я свою поднимаю, и у*бываю!»

4. С критикой по жизни

Фраза: «Вы знаете, милочка, что такое говно?… Так вот, оно по сравнению с моей жизнью – повидло».

Так резюмировала Раневская. До глубокой старости она оставалась востребована в кино и театре, созданные ей роли, включая эпизодические, цитировались и были любимы советским зрителем. При этом неуживчивость характера привела к тому, что Фаина Георгиевна жила в полном одиночестве – не считая любимую дворняжку по кличке Мальчик и сиамского кота Тики.

 

5. Сестрам по разуму

 

Фраза: «Почему все дуры такие женщины?»

Ответ на этот вопрос можно попробовать найти в книге с одноименным названием. Ее авторство приписывается Раневской, но это до сих пор вызывает у многих справедливые сомнения. Хотя зная насмешливый нрав Фаины Георгиевны, вполне лог

 

ично было бы предположить, что крылатая фраза принадлежит именно ей.

Острая на язык актриса не щадила никого, и представительниц прекрасного пола – в том числе: «Всю жизнь я страшно боюсь глупых. Особенно баб. Никогда не знаешь, как с ними разговаривать, не скатываясь до их уровня».

6. О формах…

Фраза: «С такой **пой надо сидеть дома!»

К слову о критике, которую Раневская обрушивала

 

на своих соотечественниц. Фаина Георгиевна редко стеснялась открыто обсуждать чью-либо внешность – хоть свою, хоть прохожих.

Однажды, провожая взглядом проходящую мимо даму, актриса – то ли язвительно, то ли одобрительно — заявила: «Такая называется «**па-игрунья».

А вот другой прохожей досталось от Раневской по полной программе. «А с такой **пой надо было сидеть дома!» — резко бросила артистка.

7. … и содержании

 

Фраза: «Знали бы вы, сколько в человеке дерьма!»

Однажды во время проходивших за городом съемок в очередном фильме, у Раневской приключилось серьезнейшее расстройство желудка.

Утомленные долгим ожиданием участники съемочной группы уже заподозрили, что случилось что-то непоправимое, когда дверь деревянного туалета распахнулась и оттуда вышла Фаина Георгиевна. «Братцы вы мои! – заявила актриса. – Если бы вы только знали, сколько в человеке дерьма…»

8. Свой взгляд на официальное искусство

 

Фраза: «Это какой-то холодильник с бородой!»

В 60-е годы прошлого века на Театральной площади в Москве установили памятник Карлу Марксу. Очевидно, соседство бронзовой фигуры с Большим театром Раневской не понравилось.

Когда актрису спросили, видела ли она монумент великому автору «Капитала», она удивленно вскинула брови и уточнила: «Вы имеете в виду этот холодильник с бородой, что недавно поставили у Большого театра?»

 

9. В любой неловкой ситуации

Фраза: «Вас не шокирует, что я курю?»

Однажды в гримерку Раневской по какому-то сверхважному делу вбежал один из сотрудников театра. Увиденное там заставило торопливого мужчину буквально потерять дар речи: Фаина Георгиевна курила у окна абсолютно голая.

«Дорогой мой, вас не шокирует, что я курю?» — невинно спросила актриса, повернувшись к незваному гостю и не сделав ни малейшей попытки прикрыться.

 

10. Деликатно, но далеко

Фраза: «Надеюсь, вас в подворотне искусает ваша мать»

Похабные выражения Раневской, уж конечно, не были показателем отсутствия культуры. Наоборот – они были вызовом косности, можно сказать, маленьким перформансом с ее стороны. И когда Фаина Георгиевна сталкивалась с грубостью на улице, она умела и держать лицо, и подбирать слова.

Однажды на одной из московских улиц немолодую у

 

же актрису толкнул некий молодой человек. Едва не сбив Раневскую с ног, он не только не извинился, но и нецензурно выругался в ее адрес.

Поначалу артистка опешила, но вскоре быстро нашлась и бросила вслед грубияну: «В силу ряда причин я не могу сейчас ответить вам словами, какие употребляете вы. Но я искренне надеюсь, что когда вы вернетесь домой, ваша мать выскочит из подворотни и как следует вас искусает».

90000 BBC — Earth — Peacocks ‘tails make noises too low for humans to hear 90001 90002 Peacock tails are one of the most beautiful sights in the animal kingdom. But they’re not just pretty to look at. The birds also use their huge tails to make a loud noise — which humans are utterly incapable of hearing. 90003 90002 When a peacock shakes his tail, it produces a sound that is so low-pitched, humans can not hear it. That’s despite the noise being about as loud as a car going past a few metres away.90003 90002 Angela Freeman and James Hare of the University of Manitoba in Winnipeg, Canada have shown that peacocks can make these «infrasound» noises with their tails. The birds can also sense and respond to the noise. 90003 90002 «Humans do not often think about infrasound as a potential signal, because we do not perceive it,» says Freeman. «I think it’s more common than we think.» 90003 90002 The pair’s results are published in the journal 90011 Animal Behaviour 90012. 90003 90002 Hare got the idea when he visited a local zoo and saw a peacock shaking its tail at a concrete wall.Initially baffled, he realised that the huge tail looked a bit like a satellite dish, and wondered if the bird was listening to itself. 90003 90002 Freeman and Hare recorded the sounds made by 46 displaying peacocks. «They shake the feathers,» says Freeman. «It just kinda looks like they’re vibrating.» 90003 90002 To human ears, it sounds like «rustling grass in the wind». But the recordings revealed that the shaking tail feathers also made noises too low-pitched for humans to hear. This infrasound was loud, between 70 and 108 decibels.90003 90002 When Freeman and Hare played the recordings back to other peafowl, both males and females became more alert and spent more time walking or running. Also, «the males would call in response to these signals,» says Freeman. 90003 90002 It’s not clear how the peacocks detect the infrasound. «We know that some birds are able to perceive vibration through their legs,» says Freeman. But the sound might not have been intense enough for that. 90003 90002 «The other option is they’re hearing it through their ears,» says Freeman.The inner ears of peafowl do seem to be the right shape to pick up infrasound. 90003 90002 For the males, making infrasound might serve two purposes. 90003 90002 «We think it’s probably something to do with territory maintenance,» says Freeman. A male holding a territory might hear the infrasound produced by an approaching rival, and call out to warn him off. «If he hears another male it would make sense for him to respond in some way.» 90003 90002 The infrasound could also be a way to attract females.90003 90002 A peacock’s large tail is a signal of strength and good genes, essentially telling females «I’m in such good condition, I can afford to carry this enormous heavy tail behind me». 90003 90002 The infrasound might reinforce that message, says Freeman. «If you do not have a tail you can not produce the sound,» she says. 90003 90002 Producing low-frequency sound might seem pointless, but in peafowls ‘natural habitat it makes sense. They live in scrubby woodland, so high-pitched calls get muffled even over quite short distances.90003 90002 «Oftentimes they can not see each other from where they’re displaying,» says Freeman. «We think that possibly these signals could signal to females and males who are out of sight behind a bush or over the hill.» 90003 .90000 Peacock Tail Images, Stock Photos & Vectors 90001 You’re currently using an older browser and your experience may not be optimal. Please consider upgrading. Learn more. ImagesImages homeCurated collectionsPhotosVectorsOffset ImagesCategoriesAbstractAnimals / WildlifeThe ArtsBackgrounds / TexturesBeauty / FashionBuildings / LandmarksBusiness / FinanceCelebritiesEditorialEducationFood and DrinkHealthcare / MedicalHolidaysIllustrations / Clip-ArtIndustrialInteriorsMiscellaneousNatureObjectsParks / OutdoorPeopleReligionScienceSigns / SymbolsSports / RecreationTechnologyTransportationVectorsVintageAll categoriesFootageFootage homeCurated collectionsShutterstock SelectShutterstock ElementsCategoriesAnimals / WildlifeBuildings / LandmarksBackgrounds / TexturesBusiness / FinanceEducationFood and DrinkHealth CareHolidaysObjectsIndustrialArtNaturePeopleReligionScienceTechnologySigns / SymbolsSports / RecreationTransportationEditorialAll categoriesEditorialEditorial homeEntertainmentNewsRoyaltySportsMusicMusic homePremiumBeatToolsShutterstock EditorMobile appsPluginsImage resizerFile converterCollage makerColor schemesBlogBlog homeDesignVideoContributorNews 90002 PremiumBeat blogEnterprisePric ing 90003 Log in 90004 90003 Sign up 90004 90003 Menu 90004 FiltersAll images 90009 90010 All images 90011 90012 Photos 90011 90014 Vectors 90011 90016 Illustrations 90011 90018 Editorial 90011 90020 Footage 90011 90022 Music 90011 90002 90025 90026.90000 9 Feathery Facts About Peacocks 90001 90002 A supercolony of invasive Argentine ants (90003 Linepithema humile 90004) stretches for 560 miles beneath California, from San Diego to San Francisco. The billions of Argentine ants are unlike other ants in many ways-and they are virtually indestructible. Along with their supercolonies in Europe, Japan, and Australia, 90003 L. humile’s 90004 global domination is rivaled only by that of human beings. Here’s what you should know about these prolific pests.90007 90008 1. Argentine ant colonies are ruled by hundreds of queens. 90009 90002 Most ant colonies revolve around a single queen. Growing much larger than the worker drones, she is programmed to mate as quickly as possible, then to leave her nest of origin and establish a new one. In some species, a single queen can lay millions of eggs in a lifetime, producing an army of worker drones and future queens who will go off to build their own nests. But unlike most ants, Argentines are polygynous: Each nest contains multiple queens.In some, they can form up to 30 percent of the population. 90007 90008 2. Argentine ants move their nests frequently. 90009 90002 Nest types vary from ant species to ant species, but those who live in soil commonly dig tunnels and chambers deep into the earth that will protect the colony throughout the life of the queen. 90003 L. humile 90004, though, is transient and ever shifting. Argentine ants frequently pack up their eggs and move the entire colony, queen and all, to a new nest, even when there is no apparent threat.Biologist Deborah Gordon told 90003 Ars Technica 90004 that the ants typically have 20 to 30 shallow nests at any one time, which can be built up in a matter of just weeks. 90007 90008 3. Argentine ants traveled the U.S. before settling down in California. 90009 90002 Argentine ants arrived in the United States from Northern Argentina in the late 19th century, when the first recorded Argentine ant was found in Louisiana in 1891. Researchers believe that the ants hitched a ride to North America in Argentinian shipments of coffee or sugar off- loaded at the Port of New Orleans.From there, they traveled-most likely by train-across the South and into California. Enticed by the Mediterranean climate, one similar to that of its original home in South America, the ants set up shop. By 1907 році, they’d displaced local native ants and begun their first steps towards total soil domination along 560 miles of California coastline. 90007 90008 4. California’s Argentine ants are more laid-back than their South American cousins. 90009 90002 In side-by-side comparisons of Argentine ants from their South American homeland and California, researchers have found that those from the West Coast are far more mellow than those from Argentina.In studies, it was typical for two ants from different nests to fight when placed in the same vial in Argentina, but in California, ants from different nests rarely fought, even when they were collected from locations several hundred miles apart. 90007 90002 A DNA study of ants from both locations in 2000 revealed a stark difference. In the ants from Argentina, microsatellites-short, uniquely patterned DNA sequences passed down from generation to generation-had more than twice as much variation as the microsatellites of the Californian ants.When two individuals from different nests in California were placed together, they recognized one another as family. The ants from Argentina did not, making them more likely to display territorial aggression. 90007 90002 The difference is rooted in the genetic bottleneck the ants encountered on their arrival to the Golden State over a century ago. According to biologist Neil D. Tsutsui, who conducted the DNA study, the ants in California today are all descendants of that founding colony. «It would be as if all of the people in the United States were descended from the Pilgrims who came here in 1620,» he told the 90003 Stanford Report 90004 in 2004.Instead of competing with one another, generation after generation has worked together to take out native ants and build an immense California colony. 90007 90008 5. Argentine ants protect other insects in exchange for sweet, sweet honeydew. 90009 90002 Argentine ants love to feed on sweet nectar, but flowers and suburban kitchens are not the only source of such desirable foodstuffs. Insects that feed on plant sap, like mealybugs, scales, and aphids, naturally excrete sugar-rich liquid «honeydew» from their butts.To secure a steady flow of the sticky-sweet substance, Argentine ants will fight off the predators of their insect chefs, including soldier beetles and midges. They’ll even relocate their honeydew producers to better food sources or microclimates to get the most they can out of their anal secretions. 90007 90008 6. The California Argetine ant supercolony is one-sixth the size of Southern Europe’s. 90009 90002 The California supercolony, which scientists have named the «Californian large,» is only the second-biggest conglomeration of Argentine ants in the world.The biggest colony is found along Southern Europe’s Mediterranean coast, where it stretches 3700 miles from northern Italy to the Atlantic coast of Spain. The ants, introduced around 80 years ago, now number in the billions. Smaller supercolonies also exist in Japan and Australia. 90007 90008 7. Argentine ants are second only to humans in their scale of world domination. 90009 90002 In 2009 researchers discovered that Argentine ants from three of the world’s largest supercolonies (Southern Europe, California, and Japan) are so closely related that they actually form a single mega-colony.The study, led by Eriki Sunamura from the University of Tokyo, found that when placed together, ants from the three supercolonies refused to fight. Instead, they rubbed antennae in greeting the way 90003 L. humile 90004 does when interacting with genetically-related individuals. 90007 90002 The researchers believe that the Argentine ant mega-colony is not just the largest insect colony ever identified; it rivals that of human colonization around the globe. Presenting their findings in the journal 90003 Insect Sociaux 90004, they wrote, «the enormous extent of this population is paralleled only by human society.»90007 90008 8. A mass execution of Argentine ant queens takes place every spring. 90009 90002 Each spring, just before mating season begins, worker ants go on a killing rampage and assassinate 90 percent of their queens. Entomologists are not sure exactly why the large-scale execution occurs, but one hypothesis, published in the 90003 Journal of Evolutionary Biology 90004 in 2001, suggests that it is a «spiteful behavior» to kill the queens that are less related, on average , to the workers.90007 90002 In their study, researchers from the University of Lausanne hypothesized that Argentine ants are regularly separated from direct family members through free exchange among the nests. Before mating season begins each year, those that are genetically related band together to kill more distantly related queens. Doing so decreases the nest’s genetic diversity and allows it to be rebuilt with a queen who is directly related to the greatest majority of workers. 90007 90002 The study’s results were inconclusive and the question remained unanswered, yet researchers learned something unexpected in the process.Instead of finding genetic diversity among worker ants, those belonging to each nest were actually a homogenous population. Only the queens were genetic outliers with relatively few familial relationships in each nest. 90007 90008 9. Climate change is making Argentine ants more of a nuisance to humans. 90009 90002 Argentine ants thrive in a Mediterranean climate where winters are cool and wet and summers are warm and dry. When conditions are ideal, they largely keep to themselves, but when conditions are drought-like or extremely wet, the ants move indoors in search of more hospitable climes.Experts at survival, Argentine ants can find food or water that’s been left unguarded in just minutes. 90007 90002 With the climate crisis, conditions in California are becoming more extreme. Hot days, no longer relegated just to the summer months, are becoming more numerous and prolonged. Droughts are becoming more frequent. While these changes are unlikely to harm much of the California supercolony, they are likely to drive the residents of urban nests more frequently into people’s homes, making the ants a major nuisance for residents from San Diego to San Francisco.90007 90008 10. Argentine ants are almost impossible to eradicate. 90009 90002 Individual Argentine ants are easy enough to kill, but an Argentine ant colony is a different story. The California colony has no natural predators and, thanks to their high levels of cooperation and massive numbers, 90003 L. humile 90004 has effectively destroyed possible competitors and disrupted the ecological balance of native species in the process. Insecticides, which are unable to penetrate into the underground nests, are not particularly effective.And because the ants can pick up and move their entire nest so quickly, neither are household control measures such as ant bait. After just over a century in California, Argentine ants are now virtually invincible. 90007 .90000 Australia’s Pink Lake and the Story Behind It 90001 90002 Australia’s famous pink Lake Hillier is a sight to behold. Discovered in 90003 1802 90004 by a Royal Navy explorer its strawberry milkshake color is awe-inspiring. 90005 90002 Lake Hillier is situated in near the coast of Middle Island in the Recherche Archipelago to the south of Western Australia. 90005 90002 Exactly what causes the lake in Australia to be pink is up for debate but is probably to do with the microorganisms that make Lake Hillier their home.90005 90002 Today it’s a protected nature reserve but can be visited under special circumstances. It’s best to view it from the air in any case. 90005 90012 Why is Lake Hillier Pink? 90013 90002 The exact cause of Lake Hillier’s distinctive bubblegum or strawberry milkshake color is not known for sure. Most scientists do agree it has probably something to do with the presence of a specific species of microalgae — 90015 Dunaliella Salina 90016. 90005 90002 These salt-loving photosynthetic microorganisms generate energy by using other parts of the visible light spectrum except in orange / red frequencies.90005 90002 90015 Dunaliella Salina 90016 is able to tolerate very high salt concentrations ranging from 90003 0.2% to as much as 35% 90004. 90005 90002 These little critters produce the carotenoid pigments, beta-carotene (which are also found in carrots), that are thought to give rise to the bubblegum coloration of the lake’s water. 90005 90028 Source: 90015 Viaggio Routard / Flickr 90016 90002 There are also large amounts of halophilic bacteria and archaea in the salt crusts of the lake that could also be the cause for the lake’s interesting appearance.These non-algal microorganisms also produce a similar carotenoid pigment within their cell membranes which is either the main cause or a contributing factor to the lake’s overall coloration. 90005 90002 The Extreme Microbiome Project, part of the Association of Biomolecular Resource Facilities (ABRF), Metagenomics Research Group (MGRG), has been performed on the lake. The researchers used a metagenomic analysis on the lake to find 90015 Dunaliella 90016 as well as 90015 Salinibacter Ruber 90016, 90015 Dechloromonas Aromatica 90016, and a few species of the Archaea.90005 90002 Bacteria and Archaea tend to make up the bulk of the micro-ecology of hypersaline lakes like Hillier. For this reason, the lake’s color is thought to be a combination of these factors. 90005 90002 Lake Hillier is not the only pink lake in the world, there is another famous one on the coast of Senegal called Lake Retba. This lake was the finish line for the Dakar Rally road race and is frequently used to harvest salt by local villagers. 90005 90045 Source: 90015 Gordonlgl / Wikimedia Commons 90016 90002 Retba’s color is especially evident during the dry season (between November and June) and less obvious during the rainy seasons.90005 90050 Source: 90015 Jeff Attaway / Flickr 90016 90002 Here, the same species of microalgae is prevalent in the water which is also thought to produce the lake’s similar appearance to Lake Hillier. 90005 90055 Information sign near Esperance. Source: 90015 Hughesdarren / Wikimedia Commons 90016 90012 Is it Safe to Swim in Lake Hillier? 90013 90002 According to the official site for the pink lake of Australia, it is perfectly safe to swim in the lake. Despite the coloration, the water is clear and will not cause any harm to you or your skin.90005 90002 Just like most seas and ocean around the world with the distinct exception of not having any macro-organisms like fish to worry about. 90005 90002 The algae are completely harmless but drinking hypersaline water is a no-no. 90005 90002 Despite this, the lake is very difficult to get to making it nye on impossible for regular tourists to actually visit on the ground. The lake is best appreciated from the air in any case where you can really see its vivid pink color in contrast with surrounding forests and the Indian Ocean.90005 90002 Travelers can, on occasion, be dropped off on Middle Island from helicopter rides and cruise ships but these tend to view the lake from the shore. 90005 90070 Source: 90015 Aussie OC / Wikimedia Commons 90016 90002 If, however, on the rare occasion you do find yourself near the lake and go for a swim you’ll be in for an interesting experience. The lake is, nowadays, primarily a tourist attraction but was once used to extract the salt. 90005 90002 90002 90077 90078 90005 90005 90012 Who Discovered Lake Hillier? 90013 90002 Lake Hillier was first discovered in 90003 тисячі вісімсот дві 90004 by the British Navigator and Cartographer Mathew Flinders aboard the 90015 HMS Investigator 90016.In January of the same year, he went ashore and climbed the highest peak on the island which is named after him today. 90005 90002 In his log, he noted that he was surprised to see «a small lake of rose colour». He decided to name the lake Hillier of a recently deceased crew member William Hillier who had died of dysentery whilst docked at the island. 90005 90002 When the crew went ashore to investigate, they found that the lake seemed as salty as the Dead Sea. They duly filled up their stock with salt from the shores of the lake.90005 90002 90015 «In the north-eastern part was a small lake of a rose color, the water of which, as I was informed by Mr Thistle who visited it, was so saturated with salt that sufficient quantities were crystallized near the shores to load a ship. The specimen he brought on board was of a good quality and required no other process than drying to be fit for use. » 90016 — Captain Flinders Log. 90005 90002 Today the island is an uninhabited nature reserve that is covered in a dense Eucalyptus forest.90005 90012 Is Lake Hillier Water Safe to Drink? 90013 90002 Like any salt water, it is not advisable to drink water from Lake Hillier. When you consume salty water it can cause serious damage to your body. 90005 90002 90104 90005 90002 High salt content in your bloodstream puts a serious strain on your body’s natural ability to stabilize sodium and chloride levels. Cell membranes, though good at keeping salt from flooding into cells are semi-permeable. 90005 90002 Water can not be freely locked into your cells and in hypersaline conditions, the process of osmosis will see water fleeing from the cell’s interior to correct the concentration imbalance.90005 90002 This shrinks the cells of your body and your kidneys will attempt to correct the problem by producing urine to remove excess sodium. However, they can only do so if the urine is less salty than saltwater which can lead to losing more water than was drunk and dehydration quickly sets in. 90005 90002 That’s all before we even think about the plethora of microorganisms that inhabit the water. Although most are harmless, there is the potential for ingesting something very unpleasant.90005 90002 90115 90078 90005 .